Today I'm thrilled to welcome author JL Bryan back to the blog to talk to us about time travel and his newest release, Nomad. I first "met" JL online several years ago when I was in my first year of blogging and he was releasing the very first book in the Jenny Pox series, and I'm beyond excited to still be blogging and promoting his work today. I was a huge fan of that series and can't wait to give this new book a try!
TIME TRAVEL VACATION CHECKLIST
It’s August. You’ve packed the suitcases, kids, and dog into the RV. You’ve even got Uncle Junior tagging along this year—he’ll help watch the kids in exchange for a steady supply of booze. The flux capacitor in your Winnebago is pulsing bright and clear.
It sounds like the start of a perfect family time-travel summer vacation, but is it? The answer might surprise you.
Over 95% of families who travel through time on vacation are injured or killed. Don’t become a statistic! Family Vacationeering magazine has assembled a checklist of must-haves before you and your family activate that time machine.
1. Helmets. Whether you’re visiting ancient battlefields or tooling around the radiation-zone hellscape of 2099, you’ll want a helmet that protects you against everything from archer arrows to xenon weaponized gas! Don’t forget helmets for your kids, dogs, and cats, too! (available on our website) If your kids complain that helmets don’t look cool, just tell them: “You know what else doesn’t look cool? Getting your skull bashed in by a prehistoric cave-beast.”
2. First Aid. You don’t know what you might encounter when you’re taking little Billy to see a real live brontosaurus—Jurassic mosquitoes are the size of condors and carry diseases about which modern science knows nothing. We recommend you buy the largest and most expensive first aid kit available (available on our website). A doc-bot from the year 2794 is a handy device that can stitch a cut or perform major brain surgery as needed. Doc-bots are prone to anxiety, however, so we recommend the most expensive brand (will be available on our website in 2794—pre-order now!)
3. Cameras. Yes, you’ve told us all about how your expensive phone takes such great pictures (and you mention it again every time you use Instagram). Big deal. When you’re posing for snapshots with Elizabeth the Great, Jack the Ripper, and Attila the Hun, you’ll find that real film does so much more to capture the excitement of the day. (shop for cameras on our website)
4. Rapid-Fire or Heavy Artillery Weapon. If you blow a tire while touring the Dark Ages, don’t let local warlords get medieval on your family! Defend yourself from our primitive ancestry with an AK-47 or a Smith & Wesson Atomic Cannon (available on our website). Weapons of mass destruction—why settle for anything less?
5. Snacks. Kids get cranky on long rides, and it’s just not cost-effective to stop at a rustic tavern for every single meal (or a nutro-smoothie injection booth, if you’re traveling into the future rather than the past). A smart money-saving tip is to carry a cooler full of kid snacks—juice, crackers, cookies, tubes of Oreo filling—and let them gorge themselves into a carb-induced coma. While your offspring snore and drool, and Uncle Junior sleeps it off, you and your spouse can finally have a little snuggle-time to yourselves!
When taking your family into unknown regions of history where you don’t know the language or customs, and universe-destroying paradoxes are always a possibility, remember: safety first!
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NOMAD
They took everything: her family, her home, her childhood.
By the age of nineteen, Raven has spent most of her life in the sprawling slums of America, fighting as a rebel against the dictatorship. When the rebellion steals an experimental time-travel device, she travels back five decades to the year 2013. Her plan: assassinate the future dictator when he is still young and vulnerable, long before he comes to power. She must move fast to reshape history, because agents from her own time are on her trail, ready to execute her on sight.
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JL BRYAN
J.L. Bryan studied English literature at the University of Georgia and at Oxford, with a focus on English Renaissance and Romantic literature. He also studied screenwriting at UCLA. He lives in the metro Atlanta sprawl with his wife Christina, where he spends most of his day serving the toddler and animal community inside his house. He is the author of the Paranormals series and the Songs of Magic series.
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GIVEAWAY
Thanks to JL I have an autographed paperback copy of Nomad to offer up for grabs on the blog today, just fill out the Rafflecopter form below to enter! Giveaway is open to US residents only. Good luck!
a Rafflecopter giveaway
I think I'd visit the 1950s (in the U.S.) for the boring reason that I've always wondered what it was actually like to be a 50s housewife :)
ReplyDeleteAh Time Travel! with this book JL perfectly hits the right nerve and taste of us readers right now :)) I can't wait to read it - I'm so behind on reading, but I know that I am looking forward reading Jeff's new book of awesome!
ReplyDeleteWell, I've always wanted to visit the middle ages in Europe, but only if I can come back whenever I want (like to use the toilet!). I've been wanting to read this. JL Bryan writes the BEST guest posts! Always so entertaining. I can't imagine, time traveling as a family vacation, yikes!
ReplyDeleteYepp the cover still kicks ass :)
ReplyDeleteI have this book I just need to sit down and read it. I have got a great feeling about it because this is the second guest post I'm reading and they're great. I'd go back in time of Jane Austen to find my Darcy :D
ReplyDelete*snort* Yeah, you definitely don't want to get your head bashed in by a cave-beast or be forced to stop at that sketchy-looking roadside inn... While I don't really have any desire to time travel, I wouldn't mind jumping into one of those hot Scottish romances and "visiting" a hot Scotsman in a kilt!
ReplyDeleteOh, this is such a creative guest post! I haven't heard of this book before, but you've definitely piqued my interest now. Thanks for sharing, Jenny!(:
ReplyDeleteI would totally take snacks with me, but for myself of course! :D
ReplyDeleteA first-aid box also sounds good because I'm so accident-prone!
I'm loving this author's guest posts, Jenny! Thanks for sharing! :)
Oddly enough I have been on those trips where rapid fire weaponry is called for. Don't ask, it is a West Texas thang!
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I'd hate to travel back in time.
ReplyDeleteBut that's a great cover and the instructions were quite funny.
I love how the author's humor totally came out in his guest post!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a fun post and giveway!!
Ha! If you are using real film you might have to develop it yourself or stop off before you go home in the past to have it done anymore. LOL
ReplyDeleteI just won a copy of this book today and I'm super excited to read it (ps - saw your name in the acknowledgments, SO cool!)
ReplyDeleteThis is a great list. I love that snacks are essential to his list—I don't care if I'm going to the 18th century or down the street, I need a snack supply. :D Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for the giveaway. I would love to go back to the time of King Arthur and Camelot. I think that is a very romantic period. Thanks for the giveaway.
ReplyDeleteThat's a tough questions, since there are so many great eras I'd like to explore, but I'd be terrified of messing something up, so I don't think I'd go back too far. Maybe Victorian times or the 1920's for a short visit to look around.
ReplyDeleteI have a love for all things Jane Austen so that time period would be fantastic to travel to.
ReplyDeleteEgypt :) Thanks for sharing and congrats to JL on the new release!
ReplyDeleteThis post had me cracking up! Uncle Junior brought Uncle Rico from Napoleon Dynamite to mind! Lol! I will store this packing list and make a special note to visit the website for these: Rapid-Fire or Heavy Artillery Weapon. It's on every girl's "must have" list!!
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like an exciting read! Thanks for the post and giveaway!
Oh, time period? Wow, what a question. How about Victorian England? :)
ReplyDeleteTime travel? I had no idea! When I first saw that cover, I assumed this was some music-related contemporary. How wrong was I?! :D This definitely sound like my sort of read and I can't wait to give it a try. Thanks for the brilliant guest post! I'm super curious about this now.
ReplyDeleteIf I could time travel back in time, I'd like to go back to check out all the mysteries that we wonder about today. Who built Stonehenge and why? What really happened to the dinosaurs? How did they build the pyramids? Who were the Mayans? Where did they go? Was there really a King Arthur? So I guess I want to time hop and I'd have to do some research to find out what years I'd have to travel to.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for the great post and giveaway. If I could travel anywhere I love to travel to Scotland like in the old days. I have a thing for guys in kilts. LOL
ReplyDeleteSuch a hilarious guest post! I think everything JL mentioned is so useful when time traveling, especially if you're going into the past since I always assume the future is going to be better than the present.
ReplyDelete