Showing posts with label Personal Post. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal Post. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Life With Pit Bulls

Hey Everyone!

Along with Breast Cancer Awareness Month, October is also Pit Bull Awareness Month, and given dog rescue – and pit bull rescue in particular – is a cause very close to my heart, I wanted to share a post about my girls to bring a little attention to it, even if only in this very small way.

As with any issue, I think educating oneself before formulating any kind of opinion or stance is vitally important, so I'm hoping my girls' story helps shed a little light on the controversial nature of the pit bull breed(s) (I put the "s" there because the pit bull label actually encompasses several different breeds).

Here are just a few of the things my husband and I heard when we told people what kind of dog we were planning to adopt:

"Is that safe?"

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

"You know, pit bulls are more likely to turn on their owners than any other breed."

"I have a friend (family member, neighbor, etc.) whose dog was attacked by a pit bull."
(We got several variations of this one, with the teller recounting every horror story they'd ever heard.)

"Aren't they supposed to be mean?"

And so on.

It was heartbreaking to get reactions like those both from friends and family as well as strangers, especially since we hadn't even brought Gracie home yet. It was an eye-opening time for us, and made us both all the more determined to be advocates for the breed(s).

Since bringing Gracie home however, we've encountered no outright hostility, mostly due to the fact that she's an exemplary breed ambassador. It's hard to accuse pit bulls of being vicious killers when a smiling, wiggling mass of dog with a face that's an absurdly lovable combination of Yoda, a gremlin, and Toothless from How to Train Your Dragon is waddling toward you. (Though we did have one woman tell us after meeting Gracie that she didn't realize pit bulls could be "tame". Um. What? We didn't adopt a lion cub.)

 Her ears. I die.

What we hear most often now is perhaps the most innocent-sounding of all the comments about pit bulls we've had directed our way, but also the most damaging for the breed(s):

"You know, it's all in how they're raised."

At first glance this seems like a nice sentiment, a compliment directed at me and my husband that suggests Gracie's sweet nature can be attributed to us. Under the surface however, what this comment actually implies is that a pit bull is nothing more than a reflection of its upbringing – a bad dog when raised by bad people and a good one when raised by good people – when I would argue the opposite is really true. Pit bulls are loving and loyal companion dogs often despite their upbringing. It's this reasoning that sees adult pit bulls at the top of the euthanasia list at the shelter, or languishing in rescues for years as they continually get passed over in favor of puppies.

We adopted Gracie at 2 years old and take absolutely NO credit for the amazing dog she is. She came to us chock-full of personality (seriously, she's ridiculous) and sweetness (except when she's being a stubborn a-hole), and we've done nothing but fall madly in love with her.

I'm not so blindly passionate about my girls though that I can't understand why people might be afraid of them. Gracie in particular is built like a brick shithouse, with a head and chest that comprise at least 70% of her body weight, and it's one of the first things people comment on when they meet her. We hear "that's a thick dog" or "she's got a chest on her" all the time, forcing me to tell Gracie to flaunt what God gave her so she doesn't take it personally ;-)

Physically, both Gracie and Mya are intimidating, so when people see them and ask us what kind of dogs they are, I can't really hold it against them when they take a step back or yank their hand away when they hear "pit bull". I get it. I do. But what I want people to understand most is pit bulls are not an inherently dangerous breed. They're not what any of the myths surrounding them say they are. They don't have a special kill/fight gene bred into them. They don't have magical jaws that lock and never let go. They're just dogs. Strong, muscular dogs capable of inflicting damage who are used in cruel ways for just that reason, yes, but they are not the first breed of dog, nor will they be the last, to be used as such.

Mya is a perfect example what I hope people will start to see when they look at a pit bull. Many of you already know a little of Mya's story from what I've shared with you previously, but knowing more of the details I hope will go a long way toward revealing the true nature of the breed(s).

Mya was purchased by a dog fighter as a puppy, and while we can only imagine the horrors she endured the first year of her life under his "care", we do know the specifics of her last day with him and what led to her rescue. When she proved to be an inadequate fighting dog, Mya was used for breeding. She ended up miscarrying her litter of puppies, and for her misfortune was kicked repeatedly in the belly hard enough that her uterus eventually came out and she was left in the yard to bleed to death. A neighbor saw the beating take place and thankfully stepped in, paying the owner a fee for him to hand Mya over and then rushing her to the vet. After her surgery she found her way into a rescue and loving foster home, and that's where we found her a little over a year later.

As a result of everything she went through, Mya is understandably wary of new people. This wariness presents as growling and sometimes escalates to alarm barking when it looks to her as though someone she doesn't know is going to come into her space. Her primary triggers are extended eye contact, objects in people's hands (even treats), and hands reaching toward her face, all of which result in her hunching down to make herself a smaller target and growling.

I'm not sharing Mya's story to shock or horrify (though it is both shocking and horrifying), but to educate. While Mya does have some trouble in larger social situations, she's also a beautiful example of how resilient a pit bull can be. Despite the nightmare that was the first year of her life, she came out the other side happy and wiggly, and wants nothing more than to be near her people. While "trained" to fight, she absolutely adores other dogs, and shows not even the slightest hint of aggression no matter how other dogs behave toward her.

Because those who meet her don't know her history, however, the growling to them says "aggressive" rather than "fearful", and as a result, Mya has the very real ability to confirm the pit bull stereotype for some people. (We are currently working with a behaviorist to help us be what Mya needs us to be to thrive, and she has made a staggering amount of progress in the 5 months we've had her. We have ways to go yet, but we'll get there:))

I wish every single person who hears her growl could know her story. Know that her wariness has absolutely nothing to do with her breed, and everything to do with being abused. People hurt her. People failed her. Yet she is the one who bears the burden of that failure because she sometimes plays into the stigma of a pit bull. Mya's story circles back to the "it's all in how they're raised" comment. She was raised to be vicious. Raised to fight, to attack, to use that mythical jaw to inflict as much damage as possible for sport. But despite all that, my husband and I have a dog who loves to snuggle and give kisses. Who is unbearably gentle in disposition and wants so badly to please us that her body never stops wiggling in our presence. Both she and Gracie are more than their separate upbringings, and my hope for the future is to see an end to breed specific legislation and the idea that the breed(s) as a whole is violent.

I know there are many who would read this post and rant and rave at me about things they've seen, heard or experienced regarding pit bulls, citing dog bite statistics and sensationalized articles about attacks, and I honestly can't refute their claims having not witnessed them personally. The only thing I can say is what I know of pit bulls being involved in rescue and having two of my own, and that is despite the circumstances of how they were raised – Gracie, a neglected stray with 15 minutes to spare before she was put down at the shelter, and Mya, a survivor of nightmare-inducing abuse – they are sweet-natured and loving to the core.

For those of you who might be interested in learning more about pit bulls, there's an outstanding documentary currently on Netflix called The Champions. It's the story of the dogs rescued from NFL star Michael Vick's dog fighting operation, a landmark case marking the first time dogs involved in a fighting ring weren't automatically euthanized. They were given the opportunity to be rehabilitated instead, and it follows 5 or 6 of them that were eventually adopted out into loving homes. It's a very honest documentary and one that's pro-pit bull for sure, but it also doesn't show this case as all rainbows and unicorns where every dog has a happy ending either. There are a number of dogs that were simply too brutalized to be able to fully recover emotionally and mentally, and those dogs will live the rest of their lives in the safety of a sanctuary. It's light on details in terms of the actual abuse while a part of Vick's operation, so all you fellow animal lovers don't have to worry on that front!

This was a very long, very personal post as my dogs are my kids, and I hope it might inspire you to do some research into the breed(s) or into dog rescue in general!

Before I go, a few more pictures of my girls in all their pit bull glory:)

 "Helping" Dad lay sod in the backyard.

Gracie doesn't like to snuggle with us all that much, 
but with Mya she has no concept of personal space.

Gracie

Mya

Friday, August 12, 2016

Friday Fun

Happy Friday Everyone!

Instead of revealing a cover today, I wanted to instead share a few fun things that have been going on in both my reading world and my personal one:) I'm going to do kind of a mashup between Christina's Friday Five and Kim's Sunday Post, so thank you to both of them for the ideas!

WHAT I'M WATCHING


The Olympics! Of course. I look forward to watching every day, appreciating all the athleticism I myself will never possess. I love the big events like gymnastics and swimming, but given I grew up on the competitive equestrian circuit, the showjumping events are what I most look forward to. Those start on Sunday I believe and you can bet I'll be sprawled on my couch avidly watching.


So. My husband and I got Netflix about 3 months ago and we have been binge-watching all 10 seasons of Supernatural ever since. We're about halfway through the final season (on Netflix anyway, I think the show is on season 11? 12?), and Sam and Dean have yet to get old for me. I liked the earlier seasons where we got more of the individual ghost/monster/paranormal creepiness episodes a bit better than the epic demon vs. angel showdown of the later seasons, but overall definitely a winner!

JUST FINISHED



My attempt to keep my laughter silent while reading this shook the bed so hard I actually woke my husband up. Oops. Tessa Dare's books always have her trademark humor, but Charlotte's book was for me her most delightful yet. Historical romance lovers, add this to your lists immediately! My full review will be up in a couple weeks.

CURRENTLY READING



I'm on a historical romance kick as you can see, and so far I'm really enjoying this one. I adored the first book, How the Duke Was Won, so I jumped on this as soon as I saw it come up for review. I'm only a few chapters in, but there's already so much great chemistry between these two, and the synopsis promises a fun romp through Ireland, so I have little doubt it's going to end as strong as it's started.

UP NEXT



It's been a little while since I've read a YA mystery/thriller so I'm looking forward to this! What do we think?:
A weekend retreat in the woods and an innocent game of three truths and a lie go horribly wrong in this high-octane psychological thriller filled with romantic suspense by a Lambda Award–winning author.

Deep in the forest, four friends gather for a weekend of fun.

Truth #1: Rob is thrilled about the weekend trip. It’s the perfect time for him to break out of his shell…to be the person he really, really wants to be.

Truth #2: Liam, Rob’s boyfriend, is nothing short of perfect. He’s everything Rob could have wanted. They’re perfect together. Perfect.

Truth #3: Mia has been Liam’s best friend for years…long before Rob came along. They get each other in a way Rob could never, will never, understand.

Truth #4: Galen, Mia’s boyfriend, is sweet, handsome, and incredibly charming. He’s the definition of a Golden Boy…even with the secrets up his sleeve.

One of these truths is a lie…and not everyone will live to find out which one it is.

DOGGIE LIFE

Life with the girls has been really good lately, the adjustment after adding Mya to our family starting to smooth out and she's finally starting to really settle in. The past four months have been really challenging given Mya's abusive past and subsequent trust/fear issues (more a result of our inexperience with such issues than anything else), and there were more than a few times when we felt way out of our depth. I've done a ton of research on fear behaviors though, and have been working hard to build her confidence when she starts to struggle. She's an amazing dog though, and we're so proud of how far she's come! She and Gracie are getting along as beautifully as they have since the moment they met, and they make me smile every single day:)



Hope you guys have wonderful weekends!

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Break Time!

Hey Everyone!

Just a quick post today to say I'M GOING ON VACATION! Well, it's a staycation really since my husband and I aren't actually going anywhere, just taking time off, but I couldn't be more excited. Normally when I take vacation time I still keep up with the blog, but for the first time in 6 years, I'm taking time off from everything. Except reading. I'm going to get some serious reading done and I can't wait! Please leave me lots of good recommendations in the comments, I want to know the best thing you guys have read recently!

Posts will resume as normal the week of July 11th:)

*bear hugs all of you*

Friday, May 27, 2016

Welcome, Mya!

Happy Friday Everyone!

I talk about my dogs with some frequency on this blog, more so the past year given we've lost both boxers and gained two pit bulls in that time, and today I just wanted to do one more post to welcome our newest addition!

Mya is two years old (best guess), and had the great misfortune of being sold as a puppy to a dog fighter. As a result of being beaten nearly to death, she's wary of new people in general and absolutely terrified of men in particular. When we met her at her foster's home, she was a little cautious but warmed up to both me and my husband in no time, so we figured we were in relatively good shape. That was definitely a bit naive of us because we're new to rescue (Gracie was our first and she's quite possibly the most unflappable, well-adjusted dog ever), but the dog we met at the foster is not the same dog we brought home, as her new environment has triggered all the fear behaviors I'm sure she had when she was first rescued. She has a lot of trouble with sudden movements and skitters away in fear if either of us happens to have something in our hands, and it breaks my heart every time she does it.

Mya is proving to be a bigger challenge than we were honestly prepared for, but I know it's going to be an enormously rewarding experience to watch her come out of her shell and start to feel comfortable with us. We're going to have a bumpy road at times I'm sure, and I know Kevin and I will make mistakes (we already have) because she's the first abused dog we've welcomed into our home, but she's such a sweet girl and wants so desperately to please us. Sometimes her fear just gets the better of her, so "be patient" is our new mantra. We both know she's worth waiting for!

While she's still unsure about the two of us (but I think doing amazingly well considering everything she's been through), she and Gracie are becoming the best of friends which makes me absurdly happy. I know Gracie was content on her own, but she's a social butterfly for sure, and seeing the two of them doing zoomies and playing tug of war in the backyard all day has basically had me in ugly tears the past week and a half since Mya's been here. Mya also takes a lot of her cues from Gracie, which I think will go a long way in helping her settle in and feel safe.

Below are a few pictures! They're basically twins, but Mya is the one on the left below with less white on her face and floppy ears:)



Friday, April 15, 2016

The Great Pit Bull Search of 2016 (Update!)

Happy Friday Everyone!

Most of you guys are aware by now that my husband and have been looking for a sibling for our pit bull Gracie for a while now, trying and failing a number of times to find the right fit for our girl. It's been a disappointing and frustrating few months, with no shortage of tears and guilt at having to tell hardworking rescues that the dog we met with just wasn't a good match for our family.

We got so far as a trial adoption with one particular sweet boy back in February, but while the initial meet and greet seemed really promising and he and Gracie hit it off, once he was actually in our home his play style with her became increasingly rough, to the point where she was covered in welts and limping after just 2 days. While he was in no way aggressive, the situation continued to deteriorate despite our attempts at correcting the behavior, and I had to call the rescue to put an end to the trial. I felt like the worst sort of person because he was a wonderful dog overall, but Gracie is my first priority and I couldn't have her getting hurt just because I wanted a second dog in the home. The rescue took him back, albeit not without an impressive guilt trip that made me feel akin to someone who takes their dying dog to the shelter because they don't want to pay the medical bills, and he's since been adopted which makes me happy.

Fast forward two months and we're giving the search another go. I promised my husband I would give us a little break after the trial adoption and at least wait until after I got back from BEA next month to look again, but I failed that promise in spectacular fashion when I came across Mya. Once I saw her adorable face, I knew I had to at least write the rescue and get more information to see if she was of a temperament that would suit Gracie, and if it would even make sense for us to try a meet and greet. The rescue responded right away, but unfortunately the news was disappointing because we'd just missed her. She'd gone home with a family the day before I got in touch, and though I was thrilled she'd found a home of her own, I was surprisingly devastated because I had the same instant reaction to her that I did to Gracie when I saw her picture online the first time. I had hoped she might finally be the dog we'd been trying to find. *sobs*

A week later, however, the rescue called to say Mya was coming back because she needs to have another dog in the home, and while the family she was with was fantastic, they had no other pets and Mya just wasn't happy without a friend. MEANT TO BE YOU GUYS!!! To wrap up this exceedingly long story, we're off to meet Miss Mya today with Gracie in tow, and I'm so hoping they're as perfect a fit in reality as they seem to be on paper. *fingers crossed* I'll keep you guys posted!

Isn't she adorable? Look at that pittie smile!


UPDATE:

The meeting with Mya was fantastic! She's going to be joining our family next month when I get back from BEA. WOO HOO!

When we first arrived, the woman who's been fostering Mya for the better part of a year met us and told us to be prepared for her to be a bit wary of us, and that it would take her some time to warm up, especially to my husband. Mya had the great misfortune (as so many do) of being purchased by a dog fighter as a puppy, and when she wouldn't fight she was soundly beaten. As a result, she's very cautious around new people, and men in particular.

We walked in the yard with Gracie ready to let Mya run the meet and greet and come see us when she was ready, but to our great delight and the surprise of the foster mom, Mya bounded right over to me, gave me her paw to shake, and smothered me in kisses. It only took her a few minutes to do the same to Kevin, and for the next two hours she stayed largely by our sides.

Miss Gracie decided to turn into Dora the Explorer and was so fascinated by the foster mom's giant yard and all the new doggie smells that she couldn't concentrate on anything else. Mya was great with her though, and when Gracie showed little interest in playing in favor of smelling ALL THE THINGS, she backed right off and didn't push her the way the dogs we'd met with previously had. Gracie is an independent sort, but she's super playful too, and I know once Mya is here and Gracie isn't enamored of a new place, they'll be a great fit.

I'll be sure and do another post next month when we bring her home! A huge thank you to all of you for the encouraging comments, they meant the world:)


A pair of blue pitties!

Monday, March 14, 2016

Blog, Interrupted

Hey Everyone!

I just wanted to write a quick post today to share an update on this blog. As most of you know, work has been really busy for me the past few months, so I haven't been able to focus on the blog as much as I have over the past 5 years (I can hardly believe this is my 6th year!). The fact that my (relatively) new business venture has generated enough interest to necessitate working overtime nights and weekends is a fantastic problem to have, but it's also meant that this blog isn't the escape that it used to be when I worked in an unrelated field.

Since a lot of my clients have found me through the blog, it's become an extension of my work, and therefore something that has come to feel as such rather than something fun and different from what I did everyday. The drive to read has been steadily decreasing for me as a result, so over the past year I've dropped down from 3 reviews a week to 2 just to keep up, but even with that change I'm still having some trouble getting posts together each and every day.

Long story short (sort of?), I'm going to start posting just 4 days a week instead of 5 temporarily, giving myself Mondays off from blog responsibilities to focus more on work. Once I get caught up a bit more I'll bump it back up because I love this blog and this community, but for now I'm granting myself this small break. I'll have reviews on Tuesdays and Thursdays, a WoW meme on Wednesdays, and a Flourish post, tour stop, or interview on Fridays.

So many of you have left amazingly supportive comments when I've had to admit to not having posts prepared here and there recently, and I can't tell you how much they mean to me! I can't help but put pressure on myself to deliver content each day, but I need to cut back just a touch so I don't burn myself out entirely:)

Talk to you all tomorrow!

Friday, January 15, 2016

Meet and Greet Weekend! (Update)

Happy Friday Everyone!

This week has been a busy week for me work-wise, so I don't have any bookish content to share with you today. Blogger fail. Instead, I thought I'd do a quick personal post as my husband and I have a very exciting weekend ahead of us.

Most of you know that we lost both our boxers to cancer last year, their losses coming ten months apart and effectively bringing us to our knees as they meant the world to us. In the middle of all the loss though we rescued Gracie, our 3 year-old pit bull of ridiculousness, and she continues to be a bright spot for the two of us.

I've always loved having two dogs in our home, and while Gracie has been truly amazing about being an only child these past couple months, the house still feels eerily quiet to both of us at times and we miss all the silly moments that come with dogs being dogs together. I've been searching our local rescues for a while now to try and find a good fit for us and Gracie, and this weekend we're meeting with two potential new family members! *HAPPY DANCE*

We met with another just before Christmas and he unfortunately wasn't the best match for our family, but I have high hopes for this weekend. Tonight we're meeting with a 2.5 year-old pit bull named Lukas and I couldn't be more excited. LOOK AT HIS SMILING FACE!!! I'm madly in love with him already, so I've got all my fingers crossed that he loves us just as much.


On Saturday we're meeting with Eddie, a 1-ish year-old Staffordshire Terrier (in the pit bull family) and I think he's ridiculously adorable as well. From the information the rescues have provided on both I think Lukas is of a temperament comparable to Gracie's (a bit more laid back), whereas Eddie is more energetic and high strung. Kevin and I did high-strung for 9 years with Gatsby and Griffin, and while we loved them beyond words, we want our newest addition to fit with Gracie, so at the moment we're leaning more toward Lukas. I can't wait to meet both though, so wish us luck! Hopefully one of these handsome boys will be joining our family soon:)



UPDATE:

*sigh* So this weekend didn't go as well as Kevin and I had hoped. Lukas, while sweet and absolutely gorgeous, turned out to be the very opposite of laid back. It was pure chaos from the moment he got out of his lovely foster mother's car, and his sole goal once he met Gracie was to tackle her to the ground and not let her up. She held her own for a while, but we kept having to pull him off her and it was clear that after about a half hour it stopped being fun for her.

Eddie, conversely, turned out to be much calmer than expected, but still a bit higher energy than we're looking for. He was an absolute sweetheart though, so hopefully he finds the best home in the world soon.

Kevin and I know we're being really picky with this adoption, both Lukas and Eddie are amazing dogs deserving of great homes, they just unfortunately were not the right fit for us. We're feeling a little defeated and are going to put a temporary hold on our search for a new family member, but hopefully the right dog for us will turn up soon!

Friday, August 7, 2015

Welcome, Gracie!

Happy Friday Everyone!

Today I thought I'd do a personal post for a couple reasons, among them the fact that it's been a while since I've done one and also I didn't have any other posts prepared ;-) Time management fail.

Some of you may know that six weeks ago, after a long and emotionally challenging process, my husband and I adopted a 2-year-old pit bull from a local rescue organization. Her name is Gracie (I have a thing for names that start with "g", I can't help it!) and I meant to do a post about her after we first brought her home, but she had some allergy- related medical complications right out of the gate, and then a couple weeks later our boxer Griffin was diagnosed with cancer (we lost his brother Gatsby to cancer in December), so it's been a challenging couple of months canine-wise.

While we're not sure how long we have left with Grif, Gracie is really settling in, and after living with her for a while I'm convinced I have the most absurd pit bull in existence. She's the biggest goofball and she makes me laugh every single day with her antics–something I desperately need to distract me from Griffin's diagnosis–and I couldn't adore her more.

Without going into a long rant about the prejudice against pit bulls as a breed, suffice to say we were on the receiving end of a LOT of hostility during the adoption process when we told people what kind of dog we were rescuing, something that was hugely hurtful and disheartening because Gracie and so many other pitbulls are sweet, loving animals who deserve good homes. Since we've had her though, she's won everyone she's met over completely, and it makes me ridiculously happy to see the kids on our street get excited to see her whenever she's outside with us.

Gracie is the first dog my husband and I have rescued but she will most certainly not be the last as giving her a forever home has been rewarding beyond measure. We still run into negativity now and again when we're out and about, and I imagine we will continue to do so until the stigma of the breed fades in time, but for now I thought I'd share some pictures of her as a belated welcome to the family!


(click to enlarge)


(See that sliver of space to the left of Griffin in the top left picture? That would be where I sleep. WTH? Also, Gracie's ears are ridiculous when she lays on her side.)

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Goodbye, Gatsby


I don't do many personal posts on this blog, but today my husband and I lost our eldest boxer to cancer and I felt compelled to go through every single picture we've ever taken of him so I could share a few. We brought Gatsby home this time of year eight years ago and he has been the love of our lives (as well as his brother, Griffin) ever since. Kevin and I don't have any kids, so Gatsby and Griffin are our babies, and the loss of Gatsby so suddenly is nothing short of devastating.

We had eight wonderful years with him though, and I know he understood that he was loved every minute of that time. You will be sorely missed, Gatsby.